I sometimes think about what I want to write, words arrange themselves beautifully into my head, all makes sense and seems appealing for a curious eye. But when sitting in front of the silent window to the world, in front of the new world's typer, all vanishes. I can't find the way to make sense ...
I must have given up a long time ago on meaning otherwise I have no excuse. Just running around in a space dedicated to science, spending my time and thoughts into manifestations of life that don't need so many words and definitely don't have the meaning I was used to searching for. I might be wrong in my attempt of trying to say in many words a simple fact, trying to go back to the old days of poetry and philosophy, and that point is ... time is not on my side... and I forgot myself somewhere along the way.
The Rolling Stones - Time is on my side
Memories of myself...
We usually gather memories on external hard drives, sometimes in print. It's not a legacy of our past the habit of owning a treasure box, it's a legacy of those who knew they can make a business out of it.
I see some of my picture-memories only as facts, proofs of a reality I was part in at some point in life. But I don't actually need them. I never look at pictures to remember those bits and pieces of life, everything is just perfect in my head, there are moments that slip through your fingers when you try to grab the camera and capture them.
Things I remember when talking about this ...
The Apocalyptica concert in Prague, 2007, when, together with Monika and Sam, we went to the secondary entrance to wait for the band and have the CD signed. It was so much fun.
That Apocalyptica album had a strange color and when Eicca came out, I started a little chat with him, but I wasn't mocking him... I simply asked why is the CD pink. And everyone one around me, including him, said it's purple; like I made a huge mistake. Well, my mistake. He said they're not so much into darkness anymore.
Eicca is quite tall, the drummer quite small - he actually didn't want to let the beer out of his hand to sign the CD, but then he eventually gave up on his luggage and pass it on to the left hand.
The other girls where a bit shocked that I wasn't treating the kings like kings, they were all taking pictures with them and at some point D. said that we should take a picture too, but just the four of us, not with the band, so Monika asked the girls to take a picture of us and the band could not move forward until we were done. You know, decent people don't ruin the picture of others.
When Antero Manninen appeared, no one noticed him or maybe he's just too old and uninteresting. I went after him and while signing the CD he said like with a sigh "you are the only one". I'm not sure if he was referring to the fact that I was the only one to notice him or the only one to buy the CD. ...still a mistery...
The show was great, perfect sound, the boys were kind enough to show themselves partially undressed.
Talking about this, I remember the Skyforger concert in Cluj. After the concert was over, I was taken "backstage" by a crew member to have the vinyl signed. Half the band were just in their underwear, preparing for the shower. I'm smiling now as I remember this. I have no pictures of this moment, it would have ruin it completely.
My point is - I don't need them for personal use. What I do like are pictures of myself, they're not like memories, they are just images, just a moment in time, in a time that has absolutely nothing to do with them... or with me in the present ...
... a year ago ...
I must have given up a long time ago on meaning otherwise I have no excuse. Just running around in a space dedicated to science, spending my time and thoughts into manifestations of life that don't need so many words and definitely don't have the meaning I was used to searching for. I might be wrong in my attempt of trying to say in many words a simple fact, trying to go back to the old days of poetry and philosophy, and that point is ... time is not on my side... and I forgot myself somewhere along the way.
The Rolling Stones - Time is on my side
Memories of myself...
We usually gather memories on external hard drives, sometimes in print. It's not a legacy of our past the habit of owning a treasure box, it's a legacy of those who knew they can make a business out of it.
I see some of my picture-memories only as facts, proofs of a reality I was part in at some point in life. But I don't actually need them. I never look at pictures to remember those bits and pieces of life, everything is just perfect in my head, there are moments that slip through your fingers when you try to grab the camera and capture them.
Things I remember when talking about this ...
The Apocalyptica concert in Prague, 2007, when, together with Monika and Sam, we went to the secondary entrance to wait for the band and have the CD signed. It was so much fun.
That Apocalyptica album had a strange color and when Eicca came out, I started a little chat with him, but I wasn't mocking him... I simply asked why is the CD pink. And everyone one around me, including him, said it's purple; like I made a huge mistake. Well, my mistake. He said they're not so much into darkness anymore.
Eicca is quite tall, the drummer quite small - he actually didn't want to let the beer out of his hand to sign the CD, but then he eventually gave up on his luggage and pass it on to the left hand.
The other girls where a bit shocked that I wasn't treating the kings like kings, they were all taking pictures with them and at some point D. said that we should take a picture too, but just the four of us, not with the band, so Monika asked the girls to take a picture of us and the band could not move forward until we were done. You know, decent people don't ruin the picture of others.
When Antero Manninen appeared, no one noticed him or maybe he's just too old and uninteresting. I went after him and while signing the CD he said like with a sigh "you are the only one". I'm not sure if he was referring to the fact that I was the only one to notice him or the only one to buy the CD. ...still a mistery...
The show was great, perfect sound, the boys were kind enough to show themselves partially undressed.
Talking about this, I remember the Skyforger concert in Cluj. After the concert was over, I was taken "backstage" by a crew member to have the vinyl signed. Half the band were just in their underwear, preparing for the shower. I'm smiling now as I remember this. I have no pictures of this moment, it would have ruin it completely.
My point is - I don't need them for personal use. What I do like are pictures of myself, they're not like memories, they are just images, just a moment in time, in a time that has absolutely nothing to do with them... or with me in the present ...
... a year ago ...
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